Eclipse came first

I almost wasn't brave today --but luckily I found a little nudge and encouragement from the trees!

I made a cardboard box viewer, which didn't end up working super well --but it's alright, I got (almost) everything I wanted to see out of the filtered leaves.

They made it look as if someone had spilled an aluminum can of crescents all over the sidewalk, and I think it was my favorite part of the whole experience.

To be honest, I was so distracted by the baby moons, that I forgot to make my hands into a filtering lattice like I had originally hoped for. I wanted to feel like part of the eclipse, but it's alright! It gives me an incentive to find and hunt down another one! c:

The moons filtering onto my balcony were a lot different than the ones on my sidewalk, so me being me, decided it'd be perfect for taking a photo of my current read (which is absolutely wonderful so far). 

Okay, well that's it for my little sun-moon-earth-update. I'll see you again sometime soon, I hope!

Love, Lizzie. x

Russian July

My mood has still been a little up and down lately, as it has been for awhile now, and I haven't been able to focus much on reading or anything, really --but this morning I had a desire to go back to basics. So I'm going to be having what I'm calling a Russian July, where I will read nothing but Russian, or Russian-inspired, literature, to get me back into the swing of things. Instead of viewing Russian literature as an anxiety-inducing thing-I-should-be-doing, I'm going to use it as a comfort blanket or a home.

I'm not going to push myself too hard with it, I only have three books on my list (with some back-up options in case I do manage to finish all of them), and these will be my summer dachas!

 

First, I've got Lolita, and this year is just going to have a lot of Nabokov in it (which I am 100% okay with). This is one where I've been putting it off, even though I know I'm going to enjoy it. I'm not really sure why it's working out that way, but whatever.

Then we've got Deathless by Catherynne M. Valente --I don't know if she's Russian or not? But the novel itself is inspired by Russian folklore and mythology, and I hear it has a vague plot/story-line, so it has all the makings for a book I'm hopefully going to love.

And then of course The Master and Margarita. Another summer cannot slip by without me reading this novel. 2017 is the year, I refuse to let this one go again!

I do have an entire week off work in July, so in case I do manage to finish these three, here are some other Russian contenders: rereads for Zamyatin's We or Lermontov's A Hero of Our Time, Doctor Zhivago by Pasternak, or Farewell to Matyora by Rasputin. (Gogol's Dead Souls was a little bit of an afterthought, but I think I might save that one for November around Thanksgiving --I feel like it would make a better cosy, autumn-on-the-brink-of-winter read).

So that will be my July! I'm really excited for it, and I hope it all goes well. x

Well that's it for now, much love,
Lizzie. x

Summers are for shorts (I think I've sobered up some since the last time I posted).

With the way my mental health and attention has been the past while, I've decided to focus on shorter reads, at least for the beginning of summer --just so I don't lose what I've tried so hard to get back to.

So for May and June, I'll be filling my head with short novels, books of poetry, graphic novels, etc. (I'm aiming for anything around 150 pages or less); & so here's a little tbr for you:

I finished one graphic novel yesterday/last night (it arrived in the mail, so I set down to read it right away). I had to force it down some though, so I don't think I enjoyed it as much as I could have --or else I simply liked the first volume more, I can't really tell. But the next volume of The Girl from the Other Side comes out on Halloween, so that's something to look forward to! (Also, with the walls, it's beginning to give me Attack on Titan vibes, only if you injected it with a child-like-fairytale-folklore-esque kind of vibe, and replaced the giants with black creatures & animal parts). I like the atmosphere a lot (a lot-a lot).

I'm currently reading a book of poetry on my kindle/phone --and it's easier to digest because 1. I can read it in small increments while I'm waiting at the bus stop and 2. poems are much easier to take in rather than lengthy chapters and whole pages and all that. But I also don't know if I should be reading Sunshine right now --I'm afraid it'll be a Bell Jar mistake where it clicks too much and sends me so far backwards --but at the same time, I feel like it's a way of getting it out --and if I don't read something like it, the feelings I've been having will only bottle themselves up, and that wouldn't do much good, either. It's a risk I've been enjoying so far, though. We'll see.

Next I've got Moonstone: the Boy who Never Was by Sjón, and I'm hoping I'll be able to conquer it. It's only 144 pages, and not all of the pages even have words on them (chapters always start on the right side, and the left is usually blank). And even with that, there's not a lot of text on the pages in general, anyway --there's plenty of spaces and enters so I'm not too stressed about it. Hopefully I won't hype it up too much for myself (it takes place in Iceland in 1918 or around there); it also begins with a "boy" (I don't know if this means teenager? Younger? Older?) servicing an older gentleman, so I'm not sure what to expect out of this? But the premise seems interesting and unlike what I've ever read before (it's about cinema coming to Iceland, where a "boy" must decide whether to use it as a means of escapism, as he is rejected for his homosexuality --or if he wants to face and participate in the world --there's also a volcano erupting at the same time, so it should be a fascinating read, I hope) --and this is where I'm afraid I'm looking forward to it too much.

I don't want to list any more possibilities (I just picked up a bunch of short novels this month and April), because I don't need myself to feel too overwhelmed or stressed about it. And I think things that come in three's are quite very nice, anyways.

Well that's it for now! Much love, love love love,

Lizzie. x

(p.s. I just noticed the color scheme for this tbr is pinks, blacks, and whites, and I am one hundred percent okay with that. c: )

Tuesday, terribly

Today is always tricky, always hard lately and I don't know why I can't seem to shake it all off. My head's been a mess the past couple days, weeks - - and I feel like I should say sorry for starting off a post this way.

But today this is going to be more of a diary.

Today I thought about my fingers. I compulsively pick at them; I can't hold a pen correctly because the nail bed on my right thumb feels sore from where I've bothered myself too much. My pinky is starting to bother me, too, but it's not so useful as a thumb so it isn't too much trouble. But either way, I don't want it that way.

And I remembered Tim, and how we used to talk about getting me gloves, because nothing else really seemed to work. And I know, and I'm sure he knew, that a girl wearing gloves around is odd and out of the ordinary - - would probably make me feel self conscious and maybe even a little ashamed (perhaps he didn't know about that, or I wouldn't have) - - but he would talk about getting lacey ones, or Antique-ish ones, just so at least I could feel pretty about it.

It's days like that, thoughts like that, guilts like that, that make me wish I could be x years younger to keep that kind of goodness and kindness and lightness that seems to have slipped out of my life. Where do you find another love like that?

I'm beginning to think that maybe I do sometimes run off and ruin good things, maybe all I can do about it is scream and tear it all down from the inside. I don't know what I can do with myself.

And that's all I've got. Love, Lizzie. x

may-be, april's gone

The past couple of weeks have been pretty messy, I'm not sure what happened to the adventure trend the first part of April had going on, but by now it's gotten a little...well, messy. There really isn't a better word for it. So now I'm trying to clean up & sort it out.

I still found some pretty moments --there were some walks home from work, some rain-filled dirt, etc. My mood's been getting low again; it was naturally taking that turn, and then people began leaving and others started being cruel and now there are some missing puzzle pieces that I'm just going to have to fill with something else, somehow.

I had some poolside dates with C. and A., which eventually led to my first bad sunburn of the season (it actually looked much worse once I got home, so I'm still a little worried about it, but it's healing pretty nicely). But I've been getting some mini-doses of pool water (it's been chilly still), and even though I haven't had the concentration to read, at least I've been getting some fresh air (which is just as nice anyways).

 

(A. and I also went out for slushies, and it was so nice --the last time I had one was prom night and it was just what I needed that day).

I'm going to make the most out of the rest of May --students are leaving and this city will calm down and it will be slow and easy and I can recover and make my moves.

I also have a couple of happy and hopeful things planned out for this summer (like a trip up to PA in July), so being hopeful should help me ride out some of these bumps in May.

I also decided to try again for grad school --I'm not happy where I'm at (which we already knew), so I might as well plunge into something else, even after all this time. So I'm going to go for library & information science --at least, that's the goal, anyway. I think I can make it work. (Well, I have to, really). I won't have a choice but to be the reliable, clockwork Lizzie I've always been.

Well, I think that's about it for now.
Love, Lizzie. x

an April catalog of adventures thus far

This month has had so much in it and it's not even to the halfway mark yet. ✩

It started with a defining basketball game at a bar that is a trademark of the university, and rushing the streets afterwards to avoid the baby fires I was too nervous to jump over knowing my luck.
I learned a thing or two about the sport, and I could have been one of those girls in college to watch gmaes just for the sake of friends and company. I don't know why I thought it was all a waste of time. Lowkey ashamed of underclassman Lizzie.

Then C. and I went to the library book sale that I had been looking forward to for the past couple of months. I got plenty of books, and there are a few that I'm exceptionally excited for: Grief is the Thing with Feathers (current read), I Wish Someone Were Waiting for Me Somewhere (also a current read), Love in the Time of Cholera, Lolita (no gaudy-tacky cover included), Dead Souls (1942, illustrated, smell-good-trusty-hardback), various chapbooks of poetry, and The Russian Dreambook of color + flight (absolutely no pictures taken during the adventure --too distracted and curious to bother with them).

I also read and finished The Luzhin Defense. I feel like I need to give the second half another read, but part of me just felt off put or rushed or maybe I just love reading children so much more than adults --but either way, it was a good read, ✩✩✩✩. Enjoyed the childhood, enjoyed the end, enjoyed the wife's wedding night.

The most recent adventure was with C. and J. and we went to a honeysuckle tea room. I always try so hard to love tea and it never quite works --there was one time in my life I fully enjoyed a cup of hot tea and it was at Nana's in her bed while Bobshi was dying and it was sleepytime tea and I've never found another cup to taste quite like it. Perhaps grief or sadness had something in it.

But I will find a cup of happiness that will have me and I'll drink it for the rest of my life.

But it was a wonderful day and we walked around looking for dandelion puffs to make wishes on but I kept kicking them to help spread seeds for the sweet future little honeybees and then it became harder to find wishes but it was fun all the same.

And for whatever reason, my legs were exceptionally, luminously pale that day, regardless of the light or angle, haha. But I found a deep abyss-like Alice-like hole and the trees cup the parking lot if you even want to call it that because there is none.

x······················································               

            ······················································x

I visited Prof. L. today after not seeing him for months and months maybe a year and he was so happy and made me promise him to come back again --he said I was radiating positive energy and it all felt very hopefull. It was a very quick thing --it's exam/final paper season so he had students to talk to but it was still very, very nice. I think on Monday I'll stop by and see if K. is in, I owe him a visit, too. It's been such a nice day, I wanted to tell someone about it.

Also on the bus today (well I first spotted them at the bus stop after seeing the professor) --there was a small boy and his father and they looked so much alike and the boy was covered in multicolored marker up to his knees and his father seemed so unphased and they took selfies and talked like they were best friends and I was so proud to see them and I couldn't help but laugh and I think I might have been in the background of one of their selfies and I hope I'm smiling to myself because I couldn't help it. It made me even happier to see them, and I was already chipper and swinging my legs at the bus stop before them.

Well, I think I'm off to read or find another adventure, who knows, really.

With so much love, Lizzie. x

because not much else is happening and I need to de-stress; a spring-inspired book tag

So this started circulating on booktube, and I kinda really liked the questions so here we go:

1. What books are you most excited to read over the next few months?
        Finishing The Luzhin Defense by Nabokov
        Annihilation by Jeff Vandermeer
        Sexing the Cherry by Jeanette Winterson
        The Good People by Hannah Kent
        Possibly rereading Peter Pan after watching Jen Campbell's analysis
   
   
2. What book most makes you think of spring, for whatever reason?
        I'm not really sure how to answer this one; to be honest, most books either heavily remind me of winter or summer, rarely do they remind me of the transitory months. But if I had to pick one, I'd probably say Alice's Adventures in Wonderland, simply because it is young and childlike and fresh (and I also read it during the spring semester of junior year in high school so..).
   
   
3. The days are getting longer --what's the longest book you've read?
        War and Peace. Although I'm still super happy about reading 1Q84 this year, too, even if that one is about 250, 300 pages shorter than W&P.
   
   
4. What books would you recommend to brighten someone's day?
        I'd probably suggest The Little Prince, even if it does have some tones of sadness in it, I still find it really sweet and endearing (and it can also be read in one sitting, which may be what someone needs when they need something bright).
   
   
5. Spring brings new life in nature --think up a book that doesn't exist but you wish it did (eg. by a favorite author, on a certain theme or issue, etc.)
        I'm sure this exists somewhere, I just have yet to find it (although I haven't been really looking too much). But I'm very, very fascinated with and particular about guardian characters. Like, I don't know what I'd expect from another author, I just love platonic, guardian-protector-like characters, who defend in ways that don't hinder or cut down the person they love at their growing points. To take Plath's imagery, I don't want "guardians" who put their loved ones in bell jars.
         Also, anything platonic/asexual/aromantic is a go.
   
   
6. Spring is also a time of growth --how has your reading changed over the years?
         Well, it's shifted from fantasy-esque (although I still do like fantasy in other formats, like video games, graphic novels, anime, etc.), but in the form of written novels, I tend to lean towards the poetically weird. It's done a shift from fantasy to magical realism. Oh, and dystopia.
   
   
7. We're a couple months into the year --how's your reading going?
         So far I'm super proud of myself! I mean, compared to last year and the year before where I read next to nothing, I'm really happy I've read 6 books so far (and one of those books was 1157 pages!). And I'm a little shy of halfway through Luzhin, so I'm really looking forward to the rest of my reading year c:
   
   
8. Any plans you're looking forward to over the next few months?
        Yes! Even though they're mostly geared towards summer, they'll probably get touched on in May when it's still technically spring :) One; I want to write my children's novel, so I'm aiming to having the first draft done by the end of summer, so hopefully 'round the end of August! And two; I'm going to start up a little gardening project this late spring/summer with some coworkers (and maybe my family) to help save the honeybees! I'm really hoping, even if it's really small, it'll kick start at least some food for the baby bees.

Okay, well that's it! I'm off to adult some now, and maybe get some reading done. Until next time,

Love, Lizzie. x

springtime tbr

So I guess here I am with another tbr! I read half of the books on my winter one, but to be honest I'm too much of a mood reader to follow these things religiously anyway... 

But regardless, here's what I'm hoping to read for the springtime (moods permitting):

Currently Reading:

My mother picked up Good Omens for me for my birthday --and it's been pretty fun so far. I feel like if I was one of those people who had a basket of books in my bathroom for guests, this would definitely be in the selection, because it's quite enjoyable (although, let's be honest, I'm not going to be that person with the basket of books --no, I'm going to be that aunt with the leopard bra hanging on the back of the door for all the world to witness--these are my life aspirations).

Hoping to Read:

The first one I ordered this past weekend, and it's called The Good People. It's by the same author who wrote Burial Rites, which is the novel that broke me out of my depressive-two-year-no-reading spree. I'm really excited about this one, though! It takes place in Ireland I believe, and has some accusatory witchcraft in it, and I'm just really intrigued by it (I don't quite remember all the details of the synopsis). But I thoroughly enjoyed Hannah Kent's writing style, and I've recently discovered (er, more like realized), I really like Irish literature, or those that take place in Ireland, or anything with a touch of Irish to it. Who knew I'd love the Russians & Irish that much, I'm really just a content mess with my taste in books, haha.

The second one I'm hoping to get to is Sexing the Cherry by Jeanette Winterson. A girl on youtube I watch often (her name is Sophie C.) talks about J.W. a lot, and this was her top favorite book of 2016, I think. The summary seemed really interesting (and it had a cup of magical realism thrown in, too), and I found it on AbeBooks with such a pretty cover and such a pretty price that I couldn't not get it for my birthday month. And it's kind of on the short side (I forget how many pages), so it won't stress me out or intimidate me much.

The third is some Nabokov --the Luzhin Defense --, although I'm not entirely sure if I'll get to it this spring. Anything Russian-related seems to work up my anxiety, but hopefully I'll be able to push through it and enjoy it. I'll just have to breathe. (And the book's about chess, and it begins with a little boy becoming upset over the fact that he is old enough to be called Luzhin like his father --but that's his father's name and he is not his father so he couldn't be Luzhin and the boy puts up a fuss in his blankets on the train and oh I'm rambling but I liked the intro so much I don't know why I can't pick it up and read without stressing myself out).

And the fourth and final one (I think I'll work my tbr's in four's) might be one of the many books on my kindle. I have a habit of downloading the first pages of books just to take them for a test drive before I really commit, and I've got quite a collection going. So I might just choose one of the intros and take the leap. The possibilities include but are never limited to: The North Water by Ian McGuire, The Knife of Never Letting Go by Patrick Ness, Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep? by Philip K. Dick, Gold Fame Citrus by Claire Vaye Watkins, or The Lake by Banana Yoshimoto, just to throw a few names out in the water.

Well there we have it, some ideas for the springtime; I've very recently come up with a writing project that I can hopefully start working on (Meggie even agreed to doing illustrations for it). So I think I should be pretty busy this season. c:
Well that's all for now!
Love, Lizzie. x

life update: Sunday

Today's been very good --which is usually unusual for a Sunday, but I'm very glad it happened. I got to knock some things off my bucket list today, too, but I'll get to that in a bit.

I don't know if this is even from March, but we're going to say it was. I also don't know if webcam photos are even a thing anymore, but that's fine fine fine with me.

It was my birthday month, and it's had some ups and downs and loop-de-loops, but as a whole I'd say it's been nice. Wore some girly outfits, did my eyes all nice, and I feel like I've been occupying me a little more than I used to, although there have still been some days where it hasn't been all daisies, which is okay.
This month has also had a lot of Snapple iced tea.

For my birthday (well, the Sunday after my birthday) Momma, Bill, & Hunter all came up and we had dinner at Old Chicago --went for a walk & stopped in the kitty cat bookshop (which is closing soon I'm so sad about it) where Momma couldn't really help herself, haha --and then we went on a quick walk through some bits of Durham, where we got ice creams and stuff. It was just a really good day. It's been awhile since I've had a birthday that I've really liked, or even got to properly celebrate.

I've also accumulated some books (figured I could treat myself during the whole month, not just that one day), and hopefully I'll be in the mood to read them soon. I've been feeling a lil' slumpish lately, but the weather's turning so I think I can kick back into it. I even ordered a book late this afternoon, too (whoops). I read The Little Prince in one day (the day I got it), and it was so sweet & I loved it so much & there's a new Netflix original movie based on it --it was cute, but not as cute as I was hoping it'd be. But it was still sweet, especially since I was sick in bed with a cold that Monday.

 Now for today! I planned a little meet up with some coworkers, and we ate at a food truck rodeo!

 There are food trucks parked all the time around the city and the nearby town, and I've been telling myself for a couple years that I wanted to eat at one --particularly Chirba Chirba. 

It usually sits on one of the corners on the way home; I even remember sitting in Tim's car, telling him how I wanted to try some of their dumplings, and we'd have to make a date out of it sometime.

Well, it wasn't a date, but 3+ years later, I've finally had some of their dumplings! The local food trucks parked all in a row and it was the first truck I tried --and it was just as wonderful as I thought it'd be! I ordered some dumplings called juicy buns, and they had some sort of savory-sweet pork soup inside, and I dipped them in some garlic sesame sauce that had orange and some Chinese wine in it. It was super delicious, and I think I'll try to stop by the corner on my days off so I can have them again. It was really fun.

Well I think that's it for now, until next time. x

Love, Lizzie.

diary day

I didn't think I'd be writing again here so soon, but I had a dream this morning and I'd like to get it out before I forget. It was a blend of missing my dad and Murakami and it was the most fascinating thing ever and I wanted to go back to it (an automated voice called me on the phone and ripped me out of it).

It was November 12 and I don't know the year, all I know is my dad was alive and walking and I was not young or 12 years old but myself as a I am now. We were at my grandfather's in the dark and there was so much, my Uncle in his fancy cars and some sort of nighttime picnic/family dinner/get-together and I was taking photos and video recordings because the me in the dream knew that the next day would be November 13 where he would not be lively and talking again.

But my family didn't know --and here my mind rationalized it as 1Q84. I was in a different world, one alike the one I lived in previously, but not quite the same (my mind passed over the fact that everyone was their present-day age, and not their childhood self). I remember taking a video of my father speaking --and I was reminiscing to my mother and sister, saying it's so hard to remember his voice, and since they did not know what would happen to him, I had to play it off so I could still be part of them --and I began describing his voice the same way I describe mine (which in retrospect is no way to describe my father's but dream-Liz bought it). How it's got a sort of unrememberable-childlike quality to his voice, and that's not how I'd describe it (if I could, it's been 11 years so I can barely remember what his voice sounded like, sadly enough). They believed me, I don't know what they thought about it. Nothing happened afterwards, it jumped to another scene, but I don't know if there was a sentimentality to the whole conversation.

And I remember thinking in the dream, this is my father. The real one. My siblings and mother are not the real ones. But the real ones exist, but they have each been put into their own 1Q84s, where the real Lumpy is alive and the other family members are not the real ones. And I remember grappling and accepting the fact that these were not the same siblings I had loved and grown up with in my childhood, they were different, but my father was alive, and I was okay with it, because my real siblings existed somewhere else --even if I could not see them again. They were part of a world, I just wasn't allowed to be in whatever world they were in. It was the "price" we had to pay to have a world where our father was still alive (I say price in quotes, because it seemed we did not get to choose this world or outcome, and there didn't seem to be any regrets about it, either).

It was the strangest thing. And there was a bit where Meggie and I were trying some new grey-toned-dove-grey-blue liquid lipsticks as if we were the real sisters and it was so strange. (There was also something with sharing food with a boy I didn't know --I feel like that was influenced by the party I went to this past weekend --meeting people and breaking away from the safe shell of childhood and the comfortable things I know, it was strange and the flicker of a scene took place in Chapel Hill).

But it's been such a long time since I've actively had dreams I could remember --and it's been even longer since I've seen my father in them. It was so nice to see him. He was alive and walking and laughing and running in the dark and I couldn't help but be okay with whatever strange 1Q84 of a world I had been thrust into. I woke up wanting to be back. And my dream-mind knew that this is not how the universe operates, he is gone, but with Murakami in my brain, it all worked out and I got to have a dream that otherwise my mind may have shut down before it started.

I remember having a dream about my father when I was in 6th or 7th grade, and I remember being on Butternut, and he said I'd wake up. But he was alive and talking there, too. It makes me sad, but it feels so nice to revisit him when I can. Even if it's just in some subconscious distorted context.

I'm glad I got to see you, dad. I'm trying to go up to Pennsylvania soon, in the spring, in April. I'll come visit you, and tell you all about it. All about everything.

Love, Lizzie. x

And my birthday month rolls in with thunder (I am a pisces)

Things have gotten a little rocky, but it's alright --things should never be smooth sailing if you want to get up and grow. And I'll be 25 in 13 days, but oddly enough I've done more growing in this new year than I have during the whole lot of 24. It's overwhelming but I have no choice but to kiss the early twenties goodbye, even if I feel a little robbed in doing so (it's fine, Lizard, it's fine).

The weather has gotten alarmingly warm for the end of February? As I'm writing this, there's thunder outside and downpours and my wine is no good. It looks like water in my glass and tastes like vinegar. No good, no good.

I'm currently reading The Bell Jar finally (I purchased it after I got my self settled in and down two years ago during senior year of college--and I've finally gotten to read it this winter/"spring"). I'm absorbing the book like a lesson, finding all the unfiltered things and pretty things and honest things and natural things and this is where I get stuck and can't get the words out well. But I think the book will be important for me if I just stop binging it --I'll have to reread it again and reabsorb it. Again. I wish I had taken a class on it --I feel like there's so much that I could get out of it, but sometimes my own filter isn't enough vision or have the peripheries. Although I'm sure the library on campus has plenty on Plath..I could find a thing or two.

I also got to read the first volume of The Girl from the Other Side, and the artwork makes me swell up inside, it's such a sweet, fairytale, slow story, but I love it to pieces. The only thing I wish was different is the 'harmful' 'weak' protective-ness of Teacher, but I still love him. Still. Maybe I'm just picky in the way guardians or caretakers or platonic companions are written. But I really do love him (especially with his arms in the fire). It really is a sweet story and I need the future volumes to see what happens to the hanger at the end and you should read it all, too.

Well I guess that's it for now, I'm going to putter about and drink my terrible wine and enjoy the rain. Maybe I'll see you 'round my birthday!

Love, Lizzie. x

Few lines that have poked at my heart this month

"When Margaret grows up she will have a daughter, who is to be Peter's mother in turn; and thus it will go on, so long as children are gay and innocent and heartless."


.  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  x

☙❦❧

"There was an inexhaustible source of clouds in some land far to the north. Decisive people, minds fixed on the task, clothed in thick, gray uniforms, working silently from morning to night to make clouds, like bees make honey, spiders make webs, and war makes widows."

x  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .  .

janu-airy

This January has felt a little more a bunch more optimistic, for whatever reason I feel like 2017 will be my year; it will be mine. There was some snow (and I luckily didn't fall at all! Even though I skirted some --the walk to work was even nice, too).

I originally wanted to make a post when I had finished reading 1Q84, but then I began to fall in obsession with how these four winter shots came together. I might even get them printed.

Here's to the rest of the year. xx

(I am singing again, even on the days I need it).